Cats in the Cradle and Some Cutlery.


A child arrived just the other day
She came to the world in the usual way
But this time she was mine, with wonder in her eyes
Looking ‘round the world taking in each surprise
And I promised myself that I’d watch her discover
Help her, and teach her, and love her-
Remember my role as a mother.

Cats in the cradle and some cutlery,
Precious weight marveled at in L&D.

Maternity leave was a different life space-
It was just me and her in our own time and place.
I gazed for hours at this giggling girl
Taking my time to smooth down each curl
I knew the day was coming when I wouldn’t have time
Work was calling, I was at my prime
And I had ladders to climb.

Cats in the cradle and some cutlery,
Little feet pounding out a melody.

Back in my element, in a white coat
Fighting to keep all my patients afloat.
Wielding my clipboard, I thought of my oath
To treat every illness, destroy maligned growth
“First, do no harm” rings on loop in my head
As I visited each bed…
Does my child need me instead?

Cats in the cradle and some cutlery,
Patient on the floor needs a CBC.

My daughter performed in a ballet recital
In her three-year-old world, my attendance was vital
My family was there, and they clapped with wide smiles
But she tapped Dad and asked for my number to dial
To reach my hotel room far across the world
Where I waited, conflicting thoughts swirled-
Aching for my own baby girl.

Cats in the cradle and some cutlery,
Speaking at a conference on oncology.

At home I tried hard to be totally present-
Struggling to balance and never resent
At home patient’s charts swam before my eyes
And at work in my head I’d hear Baby Girl’s cries
Feeling myself torn between the two-
In medicine, loving what I do,
Wanting to be a mother, too.

Cats in the cradle and some cutlery,
Struggling within a dual destiny.

Eventually something in the balance gives
Shifting towards the line of who dies and who lives
I knew I had talent, that this was my calling
Too much time at home was essentially stalling
Baby Girl meanwhile yearned for my validation-
For my pleased smile watching her grow-
Somehow, I became her hero.

Cats in the cradle and some cutlery,
Eldest begging, “Mommy, are you proud of me?”

Baby Girl took up soccer, and she was damn good
I came to watch her whenever I could.
She’d tear down the field with eyes on the prize
Watching her score goals, I quickly surmised
That she was a fighter, she’d work as I had
Reflecting, hopeful, yet sad-
We could’ve been a power dyad.

Cats in the cradle and some cutlery,
Stepped out to take a call and missed your victory.

I spend most of my days traversing long halls,
And even at home I’m often on call.
Rising in my field and gaining acclaim
It’s mastery I craved, and never the fame.
But the fame took me far, on tours ‘round the world
And on Skype I’d see her soft curls
Waving ‘bye to my sweet Baby Girl.

Cats in the cradle and some cutlery,
Trading offspring for white-gloved sterility.

Baby Girl grew up while I fought for their lives,
I ordered cultures while high school arrives.
She moved onto college while I snapped on white gloves
In grad school she found the time to fall in love.
It took watching her happily walk down the aisle
To ponder, amid tears and smile-
Hadn’t seen Baby Girl in a while. 

Cats in the cradle and some cutlery,
Balancing profession and my progeny.

Holding her in my hands, an emblem of life
Baby Girl’s Baby Girl, (now a mother and wife)
While I held her I thought of the patients I’ve saved-
And the ones that I’ve lost, who now lie in the grave.
I compared contributions I’ve made to the world-
Is it greater, my work out in the world?
Or is it my own Baby Girl?

Cats in the cradle and some cutlery,
Which path can grant me immortality?









Comments

  1. Read with the tune of "Cats in the Cradle" by Simon and Garfunkel in mind

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    Replies
    1. You are thinking of Harry Chapin, not Simon and Garfunkle. I got the reference, and I thought it was clever and a bit funny how you replaced "silver spoon" with "some cutlery." This female retake on the classic song about growing up and being a parent has a lot that I want to talk about. I hope you don't mind if we discuss this in workshop next class. I will email you about it. For others, who might not be familiar with the song, here is the original that this is based on:

      "Cat's in the Cradle"
      --by Harry Chapin

      My child arrived just the other day
      He came to the world in the usual way
      But there were planes to catch, and bills to pay
      He learned to walk while I was away
      And he was talking 'fore I knew it, and as he grew
      He'd say, I'm gonna be like you, dad
      You know I'm gonna be like you

      And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
      Little boy blue and the man in the moon
      When you coming home, dad?
      I don't know when
      But we'll get together then
      You know we'll have a good time then

      My son turned ten just the other day
      He said, thanks for the ball, dad, come on let's play
      Can you teach me to throw, I said, not today
      I got a lot to do, he said, that's okay
      And he walked away, but his smile never dimmed
      Said, I'm gonna be like him, yeah
      You know I'm gonna be like him

      And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
      Little boy blue and the man in the moon
      When you coming home, dad?
      I don't know when
      But we'll get together then
      You know we'll have a good time then

      Well, he came from college just the other day
      So much like a man I just had to say
      Son, I'm proud of you
      Can you sit for a while?
      He shook his head, and he said with a smile
      What I'd really like, dad, is to borrow the car keys
      See you later
      Can I have them please?

      And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
      Little boy blue and the man in the moon
      When you coming home, son?
      I don't know when
      But we'll get together then
      You know we'll have a good time then

      I've long since retired and my son's moved away
      I called him up just the other day
      I said, I'd like to see you if you don't mind
      He said, I'd love to, dad, if I could find the time
      You see, my new job's a hassle, and the kid's got the flu
      But it's sure nice talking to you, dad
      It's been sure nice talking to you
      And as I hung up the phone, it occurred to me
      He'd grown up just like me
      My boy was just like me

      And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
      Little boy blue and the man in the moon
      When you coming home, son?
      I don't know when
      But we'll get together then
      You know we'll have a good time then

      Delete
  2. Wow this poem is super intense and really amazing. I like how it discusses the extremely timely theme of motherhood vs career and the internal struggle that every woman has as they decide their path in life. Often we condemn both choices in favor of the other, but this poem shows that its never an easy decision to make. I think this message is portrayed beautifully. Just in terms of fact checking - a baby doesn't usually start giggling during maternity leave - it just doesn't happen that fast.

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  3. Loved this. Loved this.Loved this. Loved how it went to the tune of the song.Loved how it was so relatable and how the character wasn't portrayed badly like she usually would be in other literature or film. Loved how you changed the title to make it something that incorporates the theme of the whole poem as cutlery is generally associated more with woman and the kitchen. Loved the battle that the poems character constantly contemplated. Thought it was so intense . Lastly, loved how there was no clear end. Loved how she didn't choose one or the other, and how her choice was to continue to try her best to balance both even if it kills her. If you couldn't tell, I really loved this poem.

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